


Kaoru Seta Orders Fast Food

by NieRville



Series: Kaoru Seta Does Things [1]
Category: BanG Dream! (Anime), BanG Dream! Girl's Band Party! (Video Game)
Genre: Archive Warning Extremely Stupid, Everyone Thirsts After Kaoru, Gen, Kaoru Can't Not Flirt, Naughty wordplay, no cussing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-24
Updated: 2018-09-24
Packaged: 2019-07-16 10:46:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 472
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16084544
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NieRville/pseuds/NieRville
Summary: This is the most self-explanatory title I've ever written.I intended to write something else entirely, but ended up with something silly. And gay.Oh, also! I'm new in the fandom. Enjoy!





	Kaoru Seta Orders Fast Food

Kaoru Seta was a star orbited by kittens. Hers was the nigh-unbearable burden of being surrounded by girls who adored her. The flutter of her eyelashes sent hearts racing; the graceful fingers of the thespian-guitarist-lesbian made star-struck fans almost swoon. Her life was the exact opposite of "nasty, brutish, and short" that Thomas Hobbes spoke about.

Nevertheless, even the brightest of stars need empty space around them. Having petted her purring kittens long enough and bid them a dramatic farewell, she finally entered the fast food store that suited her tastes as a fleeting mortal being.

"A lovely day to you, my dearest kitten", said Kaoru to the salesgirl.

Alas, she could not escape her charm anywhere, since even the salesgirl - who she had never met before - blushed upon looking at Kaoru's eyes and hearing her sensual intonation.

"G-good day! What may I serve you?"

"As much as I would like to taste anything you have to offer," Kaoru said, with a well-honed emphasis on the word 'you', "I think my tongue most desires a taste of something juicy between two buns."

The inexperienced salesgirl's tongue was tied and her cheeks were flustered by the charm of the sapphic prince of sensuality.

"And my thirsty lips doth desire a relief as well. Would you be willing to oblige?"

"I... I apologize," the girl blushes. "I am not sure what it is that you want to order."

Luckily, another salesgirl came to the girl's help. "Oh, it is thee, Kaoru-senpai. Is it the same as usual?"

"Ah, yes. Once I have familiarized myself with the best, I shall nevermore settle for anything else."

"Give her a cheeseburger, Sprite, and chocolate fries. Large."

"O-oh, okay."

"And give her a discount."

"A d-discount?"

"That button there." The senior salesgirl pointed to a button on the screen that held a heart with the text "Kaoru / -31% off!".

"We have a... separate discount for this girl?" whispered the apprentice.

"You will understand in time," the senior whispered in return, and returned her attention to natural gravity well of attention. "Please excuse us."

"I understand," Kaoru said in her huskiest voice. "The kittens are born as tabula rasae, like John Locke said. It is the responsibility of the older hand to guide the pure of heart onto the path of experience."

"W-will that be all?" asked the kitten finally.

"Alas, my mortal desires shall never be fully satisfied... But for this fleeting instant, I am content! I trust I can ask for more should I feel that my appetites have not been fully sated?"

Having completed the order, Kaoru rested her being on a bench nearby. She sighed, satisfied but also mystified by her strange fate. For everywhere she looked, everywhere she went, it seemed that there was a warm and welcoming kitten, ready and waiting for her.


End file.
